The Appointment

I have always hated going to the dentist. In fact, I truly doubt that there is one person in this world who actually LIKES a visit to the dentist. Who wakes up at 5am on the day of their appointment just because they're so excited they can hardly contain themselves. At the most, there are probably people who feel indifferent toward the dentist.

Regardless, I hate it.

So, I went to the dentist yesterday.

I found this place called Gentle Dental, and boy did they live up to their name. Now, it's been about 3 years since my last visit, so maybe dentists the world over have changed the way they clean teeth so that it no longer makes me clench my fists with fear (not that it ever really HURT that much, but there was always the POSSIBILITY that the hygienist would strike a nerve which would send waves of pain through my mouth. The worst part being that you never knew WHEN it would happen). That, or I just happened to strike gold with my choice of offices. I barely felt it! And it was over in about 15 minutes. The x-rays took longer than the actual cleaning. Seriously, she took about 50 x-rays. I almost asked if this would be a bonus feature on the DVD copy of my visit. "Watch your mouth from multiple camera angles!"

Anyway, that was all the good stuff. Then The Doctor came in. She looked through all my x-rays (it took a while) and said that I had nice teeth, yada yada. Then she looked at them in person, and said that it all looked good except for that one cavity there at the back.

Quoi?

Say again?

"It's not too bad, you probably don't even feel it, yet." I shook my head. "But, even so, you should come in soon to get it filled. You've never had one, right?" Again, I shook my head. "But you understand basically what will happen, right?" I nodded. "You'll be numb."

I raised my hand.

"Yes?"

"Question: will I be AWAKE?"

"Oh yeah, it's just a filling."

"Question 2: if I bring a baseball bat, will you have an assistant hit me over the head with it before we begin?"

"Yes, you CAN make the appointment for sometime next week."

"Great."

So, I'll let you know how it goes.

grumble 22 years without a single cavity grumble grumble and ALL OF A SUDDEN, there one is mutter just cause I waited 3 years between dentist visits BAH!

Later,
Jules

PS- Liz - Nick Fury is the head of S.H.I.E.L.D (Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement, and Logistics Division) which works with the Avengers. I recommend watching Ultimate Avengers for more info.

And YAY for you going to a comic book shop! What did you order? Did you buy anything else while you were there? Anything strike your fancy? Mmmm?

I haven't seen a preview for Wall-e yet, but I've read a little about it, and it looks great.

Jenna - I still have the e-mail you sent me waiting for a reply, I just haven't gotten around to it yet! But, I will say, good luck with BHS. That would be hilarious if you landed a job there.

Previews Continued

To read the spoiler, highlight the text between the arrows.

Wanted

Not many of you will probably know this, but this movie is actually based on a comic book, as well. I only know that because I read an article about it in a comic book magazine. (Stop it...I'm really not THAT obsessed. I only get the magazine when I'm traveling on the train to visit PA. It's a nine hour ride, I have to do SOMETHING to pass the time. Sheesh.)

I've never really been a huge fan of Angelina Jolie, but I think she's good in this sort of role. I liked her well enough in Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and I'm fairly confident she'll be good in this. Besides, I like James McAvoy, and you can't go wrong with Morgan Freeman.

I expect graphic violence and gratuitous sex scenes, and by Jove, I better get them!

Hellboy II: The Golden Army

They didn't actually show a preview for this, but I was checking the release schedule for the summer, and it caught my eye, so I'll talk about it.

If you haven't seen the first one, I suggest you rent it. It got little love at the box office, but it's a great movie and deserved to do better. Hellboy is a hero who looks like a demon. Well, that's because he IS a demon. But he fights against his nature, and tries to do good. He was raised by the US army, and works for the Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense. He likes cats.
I found this tidbit from wikipedia's timeline of events in Hellboy's life: "Hellboy eats pancakes for the first time. The demons of Pandemonium lament that he will never return to them now."

That really kinda says it all.

There have also been two straight-to-DVD animated features. I've seen the first one, which was very good, and will probably watch the second before the movie comes out.

I saw a poster in the subway with a picture of Hellboy with the tagline: Believe it or not, he's the GOOD guy.

I can't wait!

X-Files

From the preview, I don't think this will be the best movie ever. However, I'm just so excited to be reunited with my old friends, Mulder and Scully, that I'm willing to forgive quite a bit. I'll just be happy if it's entertaining and I get to see them kiss. Really, that's all I ask.

There was a group of 20-somethings near me in the theater who made cynical snorts for this (and almost every other) preview. I couldn't hear exactly what they were saying, but the tone was one of "man, I liked that show, but it looks like the movie will blow."

I can't understand that. Why is it considered cool to be cynical? It seems like, more and more, my generation has to put things down because being excited about something is lame. Where is the innocent joy of going to a movie and just having a good time?

I've heard a lot of people dissing Indiana Jones. Was it the best movie ever? No. Did it have flaws? Of course. But it was also a rollicking good time. It was so joyful, so innocent. You knew who the bad guys (or gal) were and they were really bad. And you knew who the hero was, and despite his getting on in years, he could still swagger with the best of them. Not only that, but Dr. Jones is a true archaeologist at heart. He goes from one piece of the puzzle to the next by calling on his considerable well of knowledge: a combination of history and local folklore. He takes the time during a high-speed chase to answer a student's question, for crying out loud.

And Shia LaBeouf, more concerned about how his hair looks than the mystery of some archaeological artifact, is downright hilarious.

Spoiler Alert-->And at the end, when he picks up the hat, and the audience thinks, "ah, so he's going to take up the mantle and go on to a sequel," Indy snatches it back as if to say, "I'm not done with it yet, kid." Brilliant.<--End Spoiler Alert

I've gone on another tangent. I wonder if there's a cream for that...?

Anyway, I hope X-Files does what Indy did: transport me to a previous time in my life. Remind me of my childhood, back when I didn't analyze every movie to death until I had rung all the joy out of it; but, rather, just let the film transport me to another world into an adventure beyond my wildest dreams. That would be a movie worth seeing.

And if they FINALLY pay off the sexual tension between Mulder and Scully, so much the better.

Well, that does it. Hopefully, by the time this is actually posted, I'll have another blog lined up. If not, you'll just have to take your chances that I'll feel inspired and write more tomorrow.

Later, Jules

PS-I've just realized that I said nothing about Dark Knight. I didn't see a preview, but I don't need to. I really want it to be good, so I think it's safer if I don't mention it anymore.

The Incredible Hulk

See, I promised I would post this! Aren't you happy? I even gave you a schedule to follow! I could get used to this...

I tried to keep the spoilers to a minimum, and I don't give away any major plot points, but if you're really paranoid, just don't read this until after you've watched the movie.

So, The Hulk.

What shall I talk about first? The brilliance of Edward Norton? Liv Tyler sporting a REAL woman's body, with curves and everything? Seriously, she wasn't a stick, and she was more than a "damsel in distress" which made me very happy. The fantastic plot, that allowed me to follow the story even though I didn't see the last one? The cameos?

What I loved about it was how they made Bruce Banner a real person. A man struggling with the beast inside, trying to keep it under control long enough to find a cure. He keeps a heart rate monitor on his wrist, and without unnecessary exposition-talk, we, as an audience, understand that when that watch shaped device starts beeping too rapidly, there will be trouble. All of it is conveyed through Edward Norton's eyes and shots of the climbing numbers on the monitor. I love when movies assume their audience is intelligent, it just makes things go faster.

So, when Bruce is being chased by soldiers, you find yourself not only worried about them catching him, but about what will happen to those soldiers if they push him too far. Chase scenes rarely have moments where the chasee stops for a bit of rest and meditation breathing to ease his heart rate.

I've already mentioned Liv's luscious curves, so check her out at the top of act two when she makes her appearance. There are some great action sequences throughout the film. Not so many that you get sick of the violence, but enough to remind you that you're watching an ACTION movie, and not just a character drama (though there's lots of that, too).

There's humor too. Like when Bruce and Betty decide to take a New York cab because they're afraid the congested subway system in an aggressive city could set Bruce off. I could have told them New York taxi drivers are demon spawn, but they didn't ask me.

And then they meet the eccentric scientist at the top of act three. He's a hoot and a half.

Everything has been so carefully laid out-the plot, the characters, and the drama that surrounds it all-that by the time act four rolls around, and it's time for the Major Battle Scene, you're ready for it. You care about the characters, so you have a stake in this fight, and you sit back, ready to just enjoy the carnage. And carnage there is. But you forgive the violence because you really want to watch the bad guy get beat down, and because they can do such amazing things with CGI these days.

And just when you think it's done...there's another little surprise.

Go see it. Really. And if you haven't seen Iron Man, go see that too. Heck, make it a double feature!

Have fun!
Jules

PS-Tomorrow, same time, same place, look for the completion of my thoughts on the previews.

Previews

All right, I know I promised a Hulk review, and you'll get it! I'm just stretching this out a little longer. So, first, I'd like to talk about the previews.

First, Hancock.

I think this looks fantastic. Of course, I'm a sucker for an anti-hero, but seriously, I'm just glad that Will Smith is playing the hero. Honestly, my first thought was "thank goodness someone's doing a movie where a black man is the superhero and not just the sidekick." I know we had the Blade trilogy, but he's much more anti than hero, and that was a while ago.

DC comics has talked a lot about how much they want to diversify the DC universe. They want the universe to reflect the diversity of the real world, and, specifically, the diversity of comic book readers. The new Blue Beetle, Jaime Reyes (pronounced hai-mee), is an Hispanic-American teen, and a favorite with fans. DC recently published an issue where Jaime goes to a family reunion. The entire issue was in Spanish with an English translation in the back of the book. One of these days, I'm going to pick this series up, and I think I'll really like it. I'm just waiting for the current story-arc to finish so I can start with the new one.

Then there's Batwoman, who strode out of the pages of 52. She's a fiery red-head who shares an intimate past with Renee Montoya, the new Question. Renee, when she's emotionally unstable, has a tendency to drink heavily, throw up emotional walls, and wind up in bed with random hot chicks. This already drove one girlfriend away, and isn't helping her relationship with Batwoman (Kate). The point being, these are fully fleshed out characters. The fact that they're gay isn't their defining quality (although, certain news organizations would have you believe otherwise. But then, didn't they do the same to Dumbledore?) Kate is also Jewish. She and Renee celebrate Hanukkah during 52.

What about Jason Todd, who's a complete a**hole? It is my belief that a sizable chunk of the American population is made up of a**holes, and in the name of frat boys everywhere, don't they deserve some representation?!!

My point is, if the comic books can do it, why not the comic book movies? Let's have a movie about John Henry Irons, AKA Steel.

Or Ryan Choi, the new Atom.

And when are we going to get some British heroes??!! I mean, sure, there's Alfred, but he spends most of his time cleaning guano out of the batcave. (Well, how else does it stay so tidy with that many bats flapping around? Huh? You tell me.)

Anyway...Hancock appears to have similar powers to Superman. Don't get me wrong, I love Superman, but despite being from another planet, he looks awfully "all-American-boyish". That's why I love characters like Martian Manhunter (this aside is just for my sister, everyone else skip ahead: "Kitty..."). He's GREEN. Awesome. I hope they give him his own solo seri-.........oh, wait. That's right. Grant Morrison (comic book writer who is currently working on Final Crisis and Batman RIP) just KILLED him. Sorry for the spoiler, guys, but I am rather irate about this. In July there will be a single issue called Final Crisis: Requiem, which will celebrate the life and mourn the passing of J'onn J'onze. So, I guess he's really dead. That, or the editors at DC really want us to believe it. I kinda think they mean it.

GAH! THE TANGENTS ARE OUT OF CONTROL!!!

My point is, I can't wait to see this movie. And I've always admired Will Smith as a talented and comedic actor. That reminds me, I still haven't seen I Am Legend. I've been told it's good, if you don't mind that it starts to break down a little in the second half. I think I'd like it. I liked the book...

Once again, this post is far too long. I haven't even gotten to the X-Files preview yet!

Okay, I'm ending this one here, and will continue at a later date. However, since I don't want a riot on my hands, I will post my Hulk review next. Look for it tomorrow (6/26) at 9:00am. Then I'll follow that with the rest of the previews.

Once again, however, I will continue writing all of these TONIGHT (6/23). Actually, it's past midnight now, so it's really 6/24. I'm tired of typing, but still have lots of material, and don't dare stop now. I'm on a ROLL!

See you tomorrow!
Jules

Dentists, Phone Conversations, and Big Green Heroes

OK, since I never got around to writing up my review of Iron Man, I am forcing myself to type this out, now, while it's still fresh. I have just seen The Incredible Hulk. I walked home at breakneck speed (composing this entry in my head the whole way), rushed inside, had a brief conversation with my roommate, Jen, whom I haven't seen in weeks, nearly killed myself on the spiral staircase to my room, and plonked myself down in front of the computer. I didn't even stop to pee, which could be dangerous. I may have to take a break partway through, but right now, I'm just going to keep typing.

I am so excited, I hardly know where to begin!

Let's start with the beginning of my day. I woke up, and before my eyes were barely open, I was already calling dentists. See, I need to get my teeth cleaned. Have for a while now. You're supposed to go every six months, and it's been quite a bit longer than that for me.

Hold on, my feet are hot, let me take off my shoes...

Better.

And let me tell you, finding a dentist is hard work. I had to make several phone calls and talk to SEVERAL people. And you all know how I hate talking on the phone. (Except to you, Mom, and thank you for your help!) I especially hate talking to strangers on the phone. Even more so when I'm asking them for help. I'm better than I used to be, though. For some reason, I was always afraid that I would sound stupid to these people I can't see and will never meet. But now I just have to remind myself that I don't care anymore. And I don't. I think my resistance is just habit. I lived so many years caring desperately how people viewed me, and sometimes I still can't shake that feeling, but for the most part I've grown past it. After all, I have no problem going to the movies by myself. In fact, sometimes I like it better. I don't feel influenced by how the people I'm with react to the movie, and I get an honest response from myself. Of course, I do more out loud squealing when I'm with friends at the movies, as opposed to all the inward squealing I do when alone. There was a part in the Hulk where I nearly burst out with a great "Huzzah!" but I contained myself.

Anyway...where was I? Oh, right: hunting dentists. It left me stressed but with a small sense of accomplishment that I was getting somewhere. At least I had a plan. (On Wednesday, I'm going to actually GO to an office, and talk to the people. I didn't have much luck explaining my insurance situation on the phone [it's complicated] so I figure I'll have better luck when I'm standing in front of them, waving the appropriate card under their collective noses. I'm always better in face-to-face situations where I can look sweet and adorably befuddled, and bat my eyes and say "Please can you help me sort this out?" Mom can do that on the phone to remarkable effect, which is how she always ends up making friends at the airline and train station who then give her free stuff and discounts. Someday I'll graduate to the phone, but I haven't completed all the requisite courses.)

Oh dear, I do have a penchant for tangents, don't I?

Anyway, with that feeling swirling through me, added to the fact that I haven't slept well for the past three nights (I'm trying NOT to take Melatonin every night) I wasn't really in the mood for work. It's not often that I think, "I REALLY don't want to go to work today" but it can happen if I'm feeling down. Still, I looked hard at my reflection in the mirror and told it to "buck up, you. I want you to get in there and SELL SELL SELL!!"

With that, I headed off to work. Once I got there, I already felt better (although considerably stickier; it was SOOO humid today). The walk to and from work does wonders for clearing my mind. As soon as I saw Annette and David, I cheered up. Annette, as I believe I mentioned, is one of the women who owns the shop, and David is a computer-savvy friend of hers, who always jumps at the chance to help with any computer-related troubles. He's a very nice guy, and I like our verbal sparring. We have a laugh, and it's all good fun. See, he's a Mac-guy and I'm a PC-girl. Next thing you know, we'll have our own sitcom.

Hold up, now I really DO need to pee, and possibly get a glass of water...that popcorn was SALTY!!

Aaaaahhh.

Work proceeded nicely, but toward closing time, some stuff happened that made me feel all upset and tense again. It really wasn't a big deal, certainly nothing to feel upset or tense about, but I couldn't shake the gloom that descended over me. I won't go into detail about what happened, just that it involved a customer, not Annette (who is the sweetest woman, and could never make me feel bad). So, I left in a slump. However, there was hope. I had already decided earlier in the day that I needed to take myself on a date, and that I would go to dinner and a movie. Well, the dinner part had to be cut a little short because the movie started earlier than I thought, but still.

So, I bought my ticket, scarfed down an everything bagel, toasted, with cream cheese (grunt of delight and varying yummy sounds) and told myself I could have popcorn.

I settled in the theatre with my popcorn, and prepared to be entertained. Before it started, I thought about what I would write in this blog. "I liked Iron Man better, but this one was still very good, and worth seeing again," I thought would be my response to the movie experience ahead. I was wrong. Hulk and Iron Man are neck-and-neck, toe-to-toe, and nose-to-nose. Basically, their bodies pressed right up against each other and the heat they're radiating could heat Russia. Okay, that went to a more sexual place than I meant, but you get the picture.

So far, Marvel is two for two. Let's hope when Dark Knight comes out, DC can make up some of that ground.

I have a blow-by-blow (get your minds out of the gutter this instant!) review, but this post is so long, I think I'll save it for another day... don't want to give you too much too soon!

Oh, stop with the moaning! It has just occurred to me that this would be a way to blog more often. See, when I have these bouts of creative energy, I could easily pour 4 or 5 blogs into this computer, but I usually just cram it all into one. But if I would just write the blogs, then save them for when I'm feeling less chatty, you'll still have something to read, even if I don't feel like writing. So, right now I'm going to finish writing about the Hulk, and just save the post for another day. Let's make it Wednesday the 25th at 9:00AM. Be there, read it, then go see the movie if you haven't already. Scratch that, go see it anyway. See it a few times.

See you soon!
Jules

Tales of Retail

Can't sleep...must blog....

Tales of Retail
Chapter One: A Snowglobe Story

At Christmas time, the store where I work sells tons of snowglobes from Austria, made by the original snowglobe company from 1900. Seriously, we sold hundreds of these last winter. They come in four sizes, and each have different figurines inside. Some were traditional, containing a Christmas tree or an ice skater. Others were a little different, like the line of circus snowglobes with clowns, lion tamers, and acrobats. This particular story concerns the second smallest snowglobe which contained a pig. (Pigs are considered good luck in many parts of Europe.)
The second smallest snowglobe is slightly larger than a gumball you get from those machines at the mall. The smallest snowglobe (I happen to own one of the smallest with a clown in it) is slightly smaller than a gumball. I know, because I can easily fit it between my jaws and still have enough leverage to bite down. If I were, you know, so inclined. Also, these snowglobes are real glass, and say so on the box they come in. Also written clearly on the box are the words "not suitable for young children".

A woman came in with her two granddaughters (approximately 7-10 years old) and one of them wanted a snowglobe. This woman had been in before, and had always been a difficult customer to please. She also had a tendency to yell unnecessarily at her granddaughters. She made a big scene with one of the granddaughters over the snowglobe, telling her that if she got a snowglobe she couldn't get a book, and she needed to decide right now if that's what she wanted. The girl clearly wanted the snowglobe, and said so, but her grandmother continued to lecture her until finally the girl just burst into tears.

In the end, the snowglobe was purchased, and the girl was happy.

Fast forward a few weeks.

The two little girls arrived at the store. This time, the grandmother was not with them, instead, they had brought the rest of the family. Mother, father, other grandmother and grandfather. The mother marched up to me with a broken pig snowglobe in her hand.

"My daughter dropped this snowglobe and it broke. I'd like a replacement."

I looked at the snowglobe, saw that it was one of the pig globes, and went to fetch another. Unfortunately, the pig was popular. We had sold out.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I don't have another one. These are all the snowglobes I have left."

The mother heaved a great sigh. "You don't have another one? Well, can you get one?"

"No," I said, shaking my head, "I'm sorry, but these come from Austria, we can't get anymore this year."

The mother looked extremely put-out.

"Well, can you give me a refund, or something?" she asked angrily.

"A refund?" I repeated, a confused lilt to my voice.

"Yeah, I mean, it just broke the first time she dropped it."

"Um, well, it IS real glass, so you have to be careful with it. We had someone break one in the store, and they paid for it."

She stared harder at me.

"It's not real glass," she said with such certainty, I found myself doubting this very solid fact.

"Uh, I...I..." I stuttered. "I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell you. It is real glass. These are handmade in Austria by the original snowglobe company." I wanted to add, "it says so right on the box, you idiot" but I didn't think that would help the situation. The daughter who owned the snowglobe in question began to cry at this point.

"Okay, well, I need a new one, what else do you have?" asked the mother, as though I had placed an enormous burden on her. I showed her the snowglobes, and she and her daughter began negotiating. It was then that I was called away to another customer, so the rest of the story I got from my boss, who finished dealing with the woman.

Apparently, she kept insisting that we should give her the new snowglobe for free. My boss asked how it was broken, and was surprised that it had actually broken when it was dropped.
While they ARE made of glass, they're actually very sturdy, especially the smaller ones. It was after she pointed this out that the woman came out with the full story.

Her daughter hadn't simply dropped the snowglobe. She had thrown a tantrum and hurled the snowglobe against a wall. In spite of this confession, and the fact that we could not at all be held responsible for little girls' temper tantrums in which they throw glass objects, my boss still gave the woman a discount on the new snowglobe.

I think she was just happy that they were leaving.



More to come...stay tuned!

Jules

Hokey Pokey

Ugh. It has been sooooo disgustingly hot here, I hardly know what to do with myself.

The heat index was over 100 degrees one day. Thank goodness our store has AC, or I think I would melt into a little puddle of nonsensical rambling. Wait, that's what I do every time I write a blog....

GAH! I'm doing it again! See, I can't focus in this heat!

*Sigh*

I'm sure I had a topic in mind for this blog entry, but it seems to have leaked out of my brain. I'm going to jump up and down and see if I can shake it loose again. Hold on.



Well, that was fun, but not particularly enlightening. And, yes, I really did just get up from the computer and jump up and down, and shake all my limbs around, 'cause that's what it's all about.

I'll post more pictures to distract you while I'm thinking...

Me, looking too cool for school in my Batman shirt


My sister and me at the Jungle Cruise


Mom at breakfast, our first morning there


My sister in front of King Trident's Carousel


My faithful steed, Happy the Sea Otter, on the carousel

I think I'm ready for a return trip whenever you guys are! I've now had two dreams about Disneyland, and both of them involved the Twilight Zone Tower O' Terror.

Okay, bye!



What? The distraction with the pictures didn't work? Awww, man! Lame.

The truth is, I have nothing to report. I'm sort of stuck in a rut right now, and I'm working my way out of it. I'd elaborate, but I don't want to. I'm just moping a little, feeling sorry for myself, and generally being disgustingly emo, and I'd rather not burden you all with my angst.

Anyway, I can tell that it's starting to pass already, and in about a week or so, I'll be up and jumping around (well, I'm already jumping, but you get the picture) and ready to take on the world again.

In the meantime, here's something else to entertain you: a new video!
This one is about a character you probably aren't familiar with (as my Mom pointed out to me when she told me she'd seen it on youtube) so I'll give you some background.

There was a show called Batman Beyond which was done by the same people who created Batman the Animated Series, Justice League, and Justice League Unlimited. It's set 50 years in the future, in Gotham City. Batman has retired from a life of crime fighting and now lives all alone in Wayne Manor, walking the empty halls with his cane and his dog, Ace. His family's company has been mostly taken over by a sleeze named Powers, and he's been almost completely shut out. His is a sad existence, until one day he meets a young man named Terry McGinnis. Terry's parents are divorced and he lives with his dad. He's a bit of a delinquent, getting into fights at school, but his heart is in the right place. His father works for Mr. Powers, and finds out some things about the company he shouldn't. One night, when Terry is chased by a group of hooligans calling themselves the "Jokerz" he ends up at Wayne Manor. Terry and Bruce work together to fight off the Jokerz. OK, long story short: Terry finds out that Old Man Wayne used to be Batman. Terry's father is killed by Mr. Powers. Terry wants revenge, he turns to Bruce for help, and gets nothing. Terry steals a batsuit and takes matters into his own hands. Finally, Bruce sees in Terry an ally. Someone who can do some good, and a way for Bruce to continue the work he started: to clean up the streets of Gotham.

So here's the video. It's very emo, but then, so is Terry. Really, this song suits his character amazingly well. Enjoy.

Disneyland Pictures

It's late, and I don't have much to say, so I'm just going to post some photos and leave it at that, for now.



The Matterhorn. Oooooh, scaaaaary.



Big Thunder Mountain Railroad



I've always wanted to take a cruise...



AAAHHHH!! NO MORE CRUISES! NO MORE CRUISES!



I didn't mind seeing THIS "Tigger"



More to come, stay tuned!