A Shaming in Brooklyn

So, I had an adventure this week, but before I tell you about it, I have to tell you some backstory.

A couple weeks ago, I was invited to a Game of Thrones premiere party.  Now, I have not seen GoT.  Not even a little bit...no wait, that's not true.  I have seen the first episode.  That's it.

And here I was being invited to watch the first episode of season 6 of a series notorious for it's convoluted plotlines and numerous characters.

Whatever, I went anyway.

When I arrived, they were in the midst of catching up by watching last season's finale which included the following scene:

The Queen is given a bold new pixie hair-cut with, what I can only assume is, a very dull knife.  She is then stripped naked and made to walk the length of the city whilst people jeer, taunt, and throw things at her.  While she is walking this horrendous walk of shame, there is a nun with a bell who walks behind her literally saying "shame" over and over.

It went something like this:

*Ring Ring*  "SHAME!"
*Ring Ring*  "SHAME!"

Can you imagine the excitement that actress must have had when she was cast in GoT?  She probably called everyone she knew, and then, when they asked what part she was playing she would duck her head and mumble, "shaming nun."  And they would say, "What?  I didn't catch that."  And she would say louder, "Shaming Nun."  And they would say, "What?" again, though this time not because they couldn't hear her, but because they couldn't believe what they had heard.  So she said again, even louder, "SHAMING NUN."  And they would leave it alone, because it was clearly a sore subject.

This scene apparently spawned numerous parodies on youtube.  Seriously, just go type in "shaming nun" and you'll see what I mean.

OK, putting that story aside for a moment, I will now tell you about my adventure which, at first, will appear to have absolutely nothing to do with the above story, but I promise it will all come around, so just be patient.

On Monday, my phone died.  More accurately, I accidentally flung it at the floor and it broke into two pieces.  (Yes, I still have a flip-phone, don't judge me).  Now, the hinge where it opens already had a crack in it from some other time when I dropped - er...when gravity decided to have her way with it.

Ah gravity, thou art a heartless bitch.

So I suppose it was only a matter of time before that crack widened into something worse.

I managed to slam the two pieces back together, but they were no longer on speaking terms, apparently.

I briefly considered couples counseling, but they didn't seem up for it.

My only option was to get a new phone.  Perhaps a fancy phone with a slide out keyboard to make texting easier!  OOOOH!  One might think I accidentally-on-purpose tore my phone asunder if one did not know that I actually really liked that phone...sigh.  This one, while it does have the nifty keyboard, does not flip closed, so I can no longer hang up all dramatically and cool-like.  Now I just hit a button.  Aw well, all good things must come to an end, I suppose.

New Phone is charging right now, so I haven't actually been able to play with it yet and discover all the cool things it can do, so I'm still in mourning for Old Phone.  I assure you that will pass as soon as I start customizing ring tones.

But, back to my adventure.

So, I had to go into a Verizon Wireless store to get New Phone and have them transfer my contacts from Old Phone.

I don't know if you know this, but Verizon union workers are on strike right now.  There was a group of them outside the store.  I think you see where I'm going with this now.

I made my way through the picketers with signs while they urged me to take my business elsewhere assuring me that I could get whatever I needed somewhere else.

Really?  I can get a new Verizon Wireless phone from someplace other than Verizon Wireless?  I'm not sure your logic tracks, dude.

Anyway, I got New Phone, left them Old Phone (they repair and donate old phones to victims of domestic abuse, seemed like a worthy cause) and started to head out the door.

One of the workers was walking me to the door and he said, "Listen, just walk past them.  They're going to boo you, but you just ignore them.  This has nothing to do with you, it has to do with Verizon."

I smiled and nodded reassuringly at him.

"I understand, but thank you," I said.  Which was true.  I didn't begrudge these people for protesting something they deemed unfair, but I also knew that it wasn't my fault or something I could fix.  They are protesting contracts having to do with the cable and internet sides of Verizon, not the cell phone side, so I really had nothing to feel guilty about.  And, in fact, at my apartment we have Time Warner, so I REALLY had nothing to feel guilty about.

So, out I walked not making eye contact, but not letting myself be intimidated either, and they booed me, as I expected.

And then they SHAMING NUN-ED ME.

"SHAME!" they shouted.  "You broke the picket line!  SHAME!"

And, honestly, I couldn't keep a straight face.  I actually smiled and laughed a little because I just kept thinking about the Shaming Nun.  Thank goodness I was already past them, and they couldn't see my face, because seriously, I almost lost it!

So that's my story.

New Phone is still charging, but when she wakes up I will learn all her secrets, customize her to my specifications, and then make the inaugural call to my mother.

Laters,
Jules

PS: SHAME!