Ghost Spider

Sheesh.  Every time I sign in to update my blog, there has been a complete overhaul of blogger.com, and they show me page after page explaining why the old blogger was crap, and this new version is the best thing since sliced bread, and I'm like, "OK, but can I still, you know, SEE my blog?  Cause I'm in a writing mood, and you're harshing my buzz, dude."

Ugh.  The window where I write the blog part of my blog is all different looking now.  I don't like it.  I fear change.  And just what, exactly, are all those buttons on the side?  NO!  DON'T TELL ME.  DON'T EXPLAIN ANYTHING, JUST LET ME WRITE, DAMMIT!

OK, I'm stalling.

Here's the thing.

This is the thing.

The thing is...

I have this story that I've been working (AKA long hours spent staring at the screen punctuated by short bursts of typing which ultimately result in one or two sentences) on for-what seems like-ever.  It's not finished.  Not even close.  But I'm oddly tempted to start posting it here anyway.  Just throw caution to the wind and let the pages fall where they may.  Hear that wind?  Some caution is about to SMACK you in the FACE!

"Chips" fall where they may.  I actually couldn't remember the real phrase for a moment, but "pages" seemed appropriate.

I know, I know: more stalling.

Let me tell you a true story:

The other day, I found a spider hanging out next to my bed.  I mean, right where I put my head, and this dude was just hanging there, like some kind of pervert, waiting to watch me sleep.

I caught him in a glass and then, because he was trying to make his escape, drowned him with water.

And now I feel bad.

Usually, I leave spiders alone.  They kill other bugs, which makes me happy, because then I don't have to kill them.  But when a spider is all up in my business, I tend to mush it.  Still, I try to make the deaths quick and painless.  So why did I drown this one?  I don't know.  I panicked.

I'm sorry, Mr. Spider, if I caused you undue pain.  Please don't rise as a spider-ghost and goad all your still-living spider friends into amassing an army and marching on my apartment at dawn, so that I may be dragged from my bed and sentenced to death by hanging.

Why hanging?  I don't know, I just figure spiders have a lot of rope to work with...

What is it with me and bug stories lately?  First Bee Pimp, now Ghost Spider?

I should maybe mention that I am drinking and blogging again.

Hey!  Don't you judge me!  Tuesday is like my Saturday.  I didn't work today and I don't work tomorrow.  Technically, this is my weekend.  I can do whatever I want.

And now I have succeeded in distracting myself and you from the whole purpose of this post...

Just kidding, I didn't forget about the whole caution v. wind thing.  Let me see if I can make anymore headway on this story, maybe clean up the first bit somewhat, and I'll think about posting some of it.

Lates,
Jules

Now where is the "post" button...

Seriously.

Where...?  Oh there it